5 little words.......

Our dear friend in blogger land, Holly, accepted a challenge yesterday and passed it on to me. I am to use 5 certain words to "weave" (her word) into a description of me. Also, if anyone else would like to participate, email me and I will send you some. I'm not quite sure how they pick them, so if I get any requests I will open my dictionary to a random page and let my fingers do the walking. (remember those old yellow pages commercials?)
Okay, enough bullpoop....These are my assigned words: urge, season, manifest, goof, and dualism.

URGE: Well, this is a biggie for me, I can't believe she picked it, it must've been preordained. Urges are something I have been battling for a long time. I am extremely impulsive, as I might have shared, when the thought or desire pops into my head, I want to do it like NOW! Only sometimes that's not a good thing. As much as I like y'all, I'm not quite ready to hang out all of my dirty laundry, but suffice it to say that the word urge translates to the biggest battle of my life.

Next on the list...SEASON: Well now, obviously we are in the change of seasons, which is looking really wierd this year, a lot of the trees are going from green to brown with no golden yellow inbetween. My knowledgeable now 17 year old tells me its because we had such hot weather, and then it turned cold so suddenly. Huh. Makes sense. But I'm thinking of season as in seasoning spices. How much seasoning to use? How do you please everyone? I like lots of garlic & onion (in fact I bought onion & garlic flavoured potato chips... haven't tried them yet. I also like ginger & cinnamon, not really one for nutmeg or cayenne pepper. Parsley and dill have their places, as do cloves & basil. Too much seasoning can drive people away from you...there's gotta be a life lesson in that. I'll let you figure it out.

MANIFEST: As in ship's manifest? I've never had the pleasure of being on one. It kind of sounds sinister....the only time I hear or read about it is in a mystery...as in there were two people on the ship's manifest who were not found after it sank. The ship that is. Not the manifest. Hmm....this exercise is great for babbling on and on. I could get into this. Ideas just seem to manifest themselves in my mind. Manifest. When you say it over & over it takes on a different meaning....like mania at a feast. Manifest. Or men at a feast. Maybe there can be manic women at a feast who manifest up some men. Did I even use that right?

GOOF: Okay, stop goofing off! I'm starting to feel goofy. Aw, I'm such a goof. Oops, I goofed. Hey Dagmar, when my mom says Trevor is a "mop" does she mean he's a goof? Goofy, goofier, goofiest. The glue was gooey because of their goofing off with the guavas. What else can I say? I'm never goofy!!

Okay, last one...DUALISM: Sheesh Holly, what in god's name can I write about dualism? Whaddya think I am, a literary genious?? Or a master of philosophy? :) Dualism..it would be easier without the ism at the end.
du·al·ism (d-lzm, dy-)n.
1. The condition of being double; duality.
2. Philosophy The view that the world consists of or is explicable as two fundamental entities, such as mind and matter.
3. Psychology The view that the mind and body function separately, without interchange.
4. Theology
a. The concept that the world is ruled by the antagonistic forces of good and evil.
b. The concept that humans have two basic natures, the physical and the spiritual.
Okay, as I read that, I guess I would go with 2 and 4b. They make the most sense anyways. It really is a concept that may require further study.

But, one thing I do know, I have a dual personality, being a gemini that's inevitable. And on that note, enjoy your coffee or tea, and your day!

September 28...Will always be special.

17 years ago from today my life changed forever. I became a mother of a beautiful baby boy. I couldn't have been happier. Then we decided our baby boy needed a younger sibling to play with. So, 15 years ago from today, we gave our 2 year old a special birthday present...a beautiful baby brother. We really didn't expect it to happen on the same day, but the baby had other plans.
Sharing a birthday, I only had to do birthday parties once a year for the first little while, until they got older and wanted seperate parties. Now, neither one want parties, but it is still a special day for us.

September 28, 1992


September 28,1994

If I had a baby picture of Dagmar's husband I would put it on here too, because it is also his birthday. Happy birthday to you, M.!

They're all mixed up...

By now I've gotten resigned to the fact that it really is fall
That summer really is over
And I'll have to wait 8 or 9 months before I can "Tiptoe Through the Tulips"
Its like jumping into a lake of icy glacier water
Takes your breath away
Until you get used to it.

But,
Because until yesterday we've had uncommonly warm weather
Summer weather,
(And I'm not complaining, but once you have resigned yourself to fall, it might as well come)
These little twin rosebuds got themselves all mixed up.
Their elders are nothing but bulbous rosehips by now
Some are still wearing their pink summer coats,
All wrinkled with age.

The optimism of these little twin rosebuds
Has kind of amazed me!

Day is Gone

Day is done, gone the sun,
From the lake, from the hills, from the sky;
All is well, safely rest, God is nigh.

When I was little I belonged to Brownies, and then Girl Guides.

We sang a lot of songs, catchy songs, some silly, some serious, that stuck in my head all these years.
Like
Magdalena Hagdelena
The Ship Titanic
He Jumped the Forty Thousand (and forgot to pull the cord)
And, "Day is Gone" or "Taps"
I think its a well known military song,
But when I see a sunset like this I always think of it.

Thes pictures were taken by my son, I took a few but decided there would be a better view from atop the roof
So I called him away from his video games.
There's not much that would tear him away from that,
But a request to climb on top of the roof did it.
Anyways, they're a little blurry, because he was standing on a slope
He said he didn't want to lean back & steady himself
Cause he might've leaned too far
And tumble over the edge.
And since I've already had one son literally break his neck this year,
I forgave him for that photographic error.

How Does He Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways.....

My husband and I have been together for 23 years, and in a lot of ways we are polar opposites. He is not a demonstrative person, in thought or action, but once in a while he catches me by surprise and makes my heart melt.

Like when he bought a huge bouquet of purple flowers for our anniversary, and said, "as soon as I saw these I didn't look any further, because these were perfect for you"


A few weeks ago, I was having some serious internal struggles. I will share the fact that I have a mental illness, which I can usually keep under control with the aid of meds. But, about a month ago, I had the coincidence of two triggering events taking place in my life, plus the fact that I forgot my meds a few mornings. It often puzzles folks why "we" stop taking them, when we know it will cause a relapse. But, we forget a few times, the level in our system decreases, and the more it decreases, the more we say to hell with it and stop taking them intentionally. Its a vicious circle.

I shared with him that I was getting "antsy", that I had to stop this before it got out of control, and that I was needing additional help. When I stop the meds, he, and everyone, gets frustrated, because they don't understand. With him, the frustration comes out as anger, which in turn, in I interpret as lack of care.

I have regained control over my emotions & impulses, with help, and for the last few days he has been asking in the moring...did you take your pills? This morning, when I stepped into my office after he'd gone to work, I saw this on my bulletin board"


Its little things like that mean so much.

I Believe

A few days ago, Mrs. E wrote about an assignment she gives her students, about what they believe. I was inspired to write my own belief list, & print it out to hang in my office. Its now friday night, but it may take me the weekend to write this. Or, I spill it all out in one shot, we'll see how it goes.

I believe in family, in the importance of trying eveything possible to keep a family together, instead of giving up during the period between the end of "falling in love" and the beginning of mature loving as you grow love.

I believe all parents have an innate desire to do what's best for their children, but sometimes get mislead onto the wrong path.

I believe in second chances, and in the ability to change oneself for the better, and sometimes, for the worse.

I believe in one day at a time, or, sometimes, one hour or even one minute at a time.

I believe that a desire to learn is crucial to success.

I believe that men indeed are from Mars, and that some jobs are better suited to men as some are better suited to women, but that we need each other to make an equal balance of yin and yang.

I believe that there is a higher power or presence out there somewhere, and that when we die our spirit lives on in that presence.

I believe that all people have good in them, some just try to keep it locked up and hidden.

I believe the only true miracle is the miracle of conception & birth.

I believe that I could live without electricity without being bored.

I believe that every person has the right to choose his own beliefs, but not the right to try to push those beliefs onto others.

Just a walk in the park with me & my dog.

Yesterday I needed to pick up my son from school, and bring my other son his bike so he could bike around with a friend. So, I went a little early, with the intention of taking a stroll through our hidden jewel....Centennial Park. Here of some of the things I saw:

The waterfalls, almost dry at this time of year. I'll go back when they're frozen & take pics then.


Evidence of romance











"Stumbling blocks"

Plenty of pools for Monty to splash in, and splash me with. (Sorry for the blur that is him!)

A faerie's crown made of foam


A Warning not to sue the Village if I fall & break my neck

Some really big trees!

Last fall's leftovers

Frustration as I tried to focus on the rosehips but could only focus around them (help!!)

Ditto for the thistles

A dirty snout (what were you thinking Monty?)

Trying to get him to wash his snout

And a mirror in the sewage pond (Yuckky Monty, don't go in that one!)

Most of us are experiencing the beginning of the fall season
Perhaps with some regret
That summer is officially "over"
Except for those who live "down under"
Who have the summer to look forward to.
(Does that seem wierd or what??)

Here in the Cariboo,
We don't have seasons
Not in the traditional sense
We have "Colours"

Green, Yellow, White, & Brown

Our aspen trees will soon be brilliant yellow gold


Then we will have white (and blue, since much of our winter skies are brilliant blue)


Next comes the season of hope & renewal.........brown.
Brown you say?
When four feet of snow melts in 3 weeks, everything, everywhere, is mud.
Double that if you have a dog. Or little kids. Or big kids who haven't yet learned to take their shoes off at the door. Or a husband who looks at the bottoms of his boots and says to himself....."they're not too bad", and traipses to the sink for a glass of water....


And finally, the lovely emerald green of summer



And,
I wouldn't have it any other way!!



I messed up the flickr credits, but here they are anyways...
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mhchipmunk/1471182390/http://www.flickr.com/photos/barrons/18435623/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/eastpole/135540401/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/phourie/3902731472/

Cross this off the "list"

Some time ago I wrote about unfinished projects
And about black cats under ladders
The project requiring the ladder is complete
(sort of)
It was only a weekend job,
But you know how it is...
Hard to get started.
Now it just needs a little stone wall
Incorporating the big rocks
Knee height
In which a little flower garden can be made.
(Or shall I make one out of vertical tongue & grooved wood?)

In any case, that'll be next year.
Next on the list,
Paint the garage.

Why is it that immediately after Labour Day
Summer knows it must come to an end?

The weather changes overnight
And smash boom bang.........its fall
Tank tops & shorts get ignored
Sweatshirts, jeans & socks make their yearly debut

Suddenly, the garden doesn't need watering
Even if it hasn't rained for a week
It retains its moisture
Some hardy souls keep blooming
But most are slowly shutting down for the season


The kids are back in school
And after the first few days
Life falls back into its normal routine
After the summer hiatus

It seems like it was just spring,
With its quickly melting snow
Then summer
The wonderful lazy barefoot days of summer

I wish it would last forever

But, then we wouldn't have our brilliant golden fall
Or our crisp snowy winters
And so
We must grin and bear it
Appreciate the beauty of each day
In this wonderful part of the world we live in.

Swimming through life.

The last couple of weeks I've been thinking...
No more blogging!
Takes too much time
Don't know what to write
Who am I doing this for
What's the point, anyway.

But here I am again
Thinking as I write, writing as I think

I'm a pretty impulsive person
Which has caused me and my family
its share of problems.

I have a tendancy to embrace new projects
I think...wow...I'd love to do that
That looks so cool!
And in the pool I go, blindfolded, plunging in with both feet
The shallow part is not for me,
I flounder in the deep end
Until I understand the basic principals
Of staying afloat
I stay in the water
Playing with other swimmers
Having fun
Learning new strokes
Until I'm cold and tired and wrinkled as a prune.
Then I climb out
Go hide in a big fluffy towel
Until the next pool presents itself.

I was invited into the blogging pool
By my dear cousin Dagmar
And I'm glad I dove in
Every now & then I pop out to take a breath
Somehow though, I always seem to
Jump back in!

This is my desk.

This is my desk on drugs.


Not funny? Sorry...you have to know the old commercial.
SO, why I am sitting here uploading pictures & doing finger exercises on the keyboard? Good question. Lets take a closer look at what I could be doing with my precious time. Keeping in mind that these are only the projects on my desk, not the rest of the house.
This is what I'd really like to be doing...scrapbooking.

And this ties in with that...I would love to earn a bit of cash doing scrapbooking for people who aren't into that. I would love to spend my working hours doing something I love. I just don't know if it will work.

This is just something I need to take a picture of & post it on EBay....because its not what I thought it would be when I bought it:

And this is what I am supposed to be doing...my work. Which I will do as soon as I'm done with this.
Adieu, Adieu, its off to work I go.

Thunder and Lightning and Cameras....oh my!

Last night we had the thunderstorm of all time
Compared to what we usually have
I couldn't take my eyes away from the windows
Afraid I'd miss seeing something
Worse than a little kid eavesdropping
Afraid to miss hearing something

Had to try to capture it on film
(okay, digital film, if you will)
But I hadn't the foggiest idea
of which settings to use.
Why oh why didn't I learn about it earlier??
I tried all the automatic settings I could think of,
But I knew that for this I needed to do some manual fidgeting
But with what???
Shutter speed was the key...I think
And I found the screen that displays speed
Along with half a dozen other things
Which is which
How do I change them
And what do I change them to?

I should be standing outside, not behind a window
That much I knew
But do I want to risk my life for a cool picture?
Not today.

Finally, after dozens of black as night shots and dozens more shots of brilliant white windows reflecting everything in my living room,
I gave up.

I'm not a dumb person
Some call me smart
(And some call me smart-ass....you know who you are...dagmar!)
But for the life of me I can't seem to retain any knowledge of photography.
And it frustrates the hell out of me.

flick credit here
and speaking of flickr.....when the pics are really small, like this one, how do you make them bigger (I don't mean clicking on them, I mean bigger to begin with?)

Through Moon Coloured Glasses

"The moon was a ghostly galleon tossed upon cloudy seas"

...or so wrote Alfred Noyes.

When I lay me down to sleep
On a clear night
With a full moon
A shaft of moonlight shines through my window
And slants across my bed.

There's something romantic about falling to sleep in a moonbeam
The word moonbeam in itself
Opens a world of imagination

And I lay back on my bed
Measure the moon with one eye open
Close my eyes
Think my bedtime thoughts
Open one eye again
And see how the moon has silently slid up & over
In that short time
Amazed at its speed, I keep watch this time
Watch it creep closer to the window frame

As I watch I can actually see it move
See the last tiny sliver of moon
As it slides out of sight

But not out of mind