You'd Think........

This is my kitchen stove.

Nothing special, somewhat outdated.

Not likely to get a new one till this one finally goes kaput

And since things were made better a few decades ago,

That's not likely to happen.

Seen it all before, right?

This is my kitchen stove from a differnt angle

Not so flattering, right?

Those pretty little things

Designed to hide the ugly coil elements

Those handy little things called burner covers.

They are my nemesis

If you've ever bought them,

Take note that the package does not come with a warning,

an advisory,

A do not handle if incompetent disclaimer.

You know why that is?

Because they know that simple-minded folks like me

Who refuse to learn from their mistakes,

Will make the same mistake over and over.

And they will profit.

At least once a month, when I'm making some delectable delight,

I'll have turned my back for an instant.

Maybe to go water a plant or two,

Or fold a couple towels,

Or do any of the other number of things that women do

When we are "multi-tasking"

Suddenly, the air is pierced by the screech of the smoke alarm.

I instantly know what happened.

Into the kitchen I run,

Pull the pan off the burner

Burn my fingers trying to flick it off

Cause where the heck did all the oven mitts and kitchen towels disappear to?

The cover lands on the floor

The dog tries to lick it as I keep him away with one foot

(Thank god I have no little kids crawling around in the way)

I may get a nice little moon-shaped tattoo

On the floor.

Matches the other ones.

But, I do learn from my mistakes

I do, I swear I do!!!

Because tucked in a cupboard

I have all the other covers I bought at the same time.

I may not be the brightest crayon in the box,

But

I have foresight!

(And maybe some stock in the burner cover makers' companies

Might not be a bad idea!)

And, by the way, I did not format this in the run-on style with no breaks between the paragraphs in which it appears.

My blog has a mind of its own!