Mother's Day at Mom's

 

It's been a long time since I was with my mom on Mother's Day

25 years to be exact

Ever since I moved "up north"

 

Not that we haven't seen each other of course,

just not on Mother's Day

It has also been four years since I have been down to "the coast"

Again, not that I haven't seen her, just, due to circumstances, I haven't been down there

Gerry has, but he goes every February for his mom's birthday (she just turned 90)

and being that we live where we do,

somebody needs to be here in the winter, literally to keep the home fires burning

we only have wood heat here and things would quickly freeze at -30 C

without that wood stove burning 24/7.

 

So, we had a nice day.

We offered to take her out for breakfast/brunch

but she said what she would really like is for me to make a big breakfast

and us all to sit down together

"like you do at Christmas"

so, sausages, eggs, toast and hashbrowns it was

Yummy.

 

Then she had a list of yard work for us to do.

Tree trimming for the guys

(luckily I found a hedge trimmer in the shed that she didn't know she had...

and bonus....it worked!)

and for me putting new spool on her weedeater and showing her how to use it

Trevor wanted me to find my old skateboard from when I was a teenager, he wanted to see what it was like

Mom was sure she still had it, that old wooden board that at one time I painted blue and put glittery heart stickers all over, but despite turning the shed and the storage basement area upside, down,

I couldn't find it.

 

 

then, after the chores were done (boy, I love the recycling options they have, worth writing a post about that is)

we went with the four of us to visit Gerry's mother

visited with her for the afternoon where Gerry's daughter came to pick up Trevor

and take him to her place for the night.

 

 

Then home again to another me-cooked meal

and a relaxing evening.

 

The only thing missing was that Jeremy was far away in Alberta

but I did talk to him anyway

Baby is doing better and things are looking up in that area,

so next Mother's Day, I may be a grandma!



prayer call

 

This is my grandson, to be named Kayden, at 16 weeks gestation.

He is now 26 weeks gestation and not doing well.

His mother has a heart condition and he has inherited it as well

and is not growing and has a slow heart beat.
The outlook is not positive.

 

For me to pray would be hypocritical but

I am being desperate and asking for prayers

in the possibility that they may do some good, not wanting to rule anything out.

 

All I want is what's best for my son. 

This baby was unplanned for but his parents decided to live with

the huge change this would bring to their young lives

and do their best for this child.

 

I don't know what's best for any of them,

my son, his girlfriend or the baby

but what I want most is what's best for my son, whatever that may be.

He's the one I love and my heart aches for him.

I wish he was here but he's not, living in another province.

 

Jeremy, I love you.

 

 

 

 

 



If today stood still.......

 

says mom to me

"are you all caught up with your scrapbooking"

says me to mom

'no, not yet, getting there."

 

The fact is, the only way I'd ever catch up with my scrapbooking is if

time stood still

 

Who doesn't wish for that every now and then?

Especially on Saturdays, my day off.

 

Any yes, that is snow outside, it was white out when I got up this morning

and it's still snowing.

Two days ago it was 25°C (77°F to the Yanks)

 but that is not something I am going to concentrate on today!!

Gonna make like an ostrich and stick my head in the ground on that one.

 

As I just keep scrappin'.



New....

 

New flag for the upcoming summer

(note to self: next year at this time of year, when I replace the flag,

make sure I haven't put it on upside down before I lift the heavy pole

and step by step it into it's holder)

 

*

New blog outlook

(can't figure out how to stretch my header photo out...will have to work on that)

 

*

 

New resolve

(am working on this 365 day project for my scrapbook, though not every day

and decided a lot of those photos are good blog posts too,

plus, a lot of times facebook is just not the forum for rambling)

 

*

New diet.  Again.  Feeling very good and energetic and not hungry at the end of day 3).

 

*

 

New season

Let's hope spring is finally here.

Sunny and warm today, holding my breath though.

 

*

 

Hopefully, I'll be back soon and ready to check out some of my blogmates that I have missed.



missing you

 

 

dear blog.....i miss you

i will come back to you

hopefully sooner rather than later

 

and between now and then

'till I see you again

i'll be missing you

 

love me



Hidden Memories

I've been thinking a lot about a thought that came to my head
Came from something somebody posted on facebook about liking yourself

I had a sudden, wouldn't call it epiphany,
more of a realization
That I cannot remember ever liking myself.

My first memory is of a shameful action.
standing in my crib no less.
And I have no memories since then of liking what I see in the mirror
Not as a whole, anyways

This summer my cousin Dagmar's parents came to visit
and spent a few days here
they brought with them some old pictures to give to my dad and I
Going through them I came across one of myself
Maybe about 15 or so years of age
the first words out of my mouth
were "God, I was so ugly"
I wouldn't have said that if I had thought first
but it blurted out and my stepmother looked at me,
 amazed that I could believe that
and that that would be my first, gut reaction on seeing that picture

Then today I was walking with my dog and pulled my mitten off with my teeth
as my hands were full of doggy leash and shopping bag
and I had to scratch an itch, hard to do with mittens on.
Anyways, as I pulled it off with my teeth I had an instant flashback
the feel of mitten wool in the mouth
the smell of wet mitten
and I was in the school yard, grade 2 or 3, not sure which
and I was doing the same thing and then let go of my mitten
as it dropped down attached by a crocheted string
that went through my jacket arms, attaching my mittens to one another
so they wouldn't get lost
Anyone who has grown up in a cold climate knows what I mean

I remember the girl, Angela was her name
who laughed at me and I can still hear her say in my head
"Haha...your mom still makes you wear your mittens on strings!!"

I had forgotten that memory, now, almost 40 years later,
it's at the forefront of my mind.
With so many others like it.

Whoever said that sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me
was so wrong.  I would take sticks and stones over words any day.

Silent is the Night

photo credit here

No I did not take this picture

my camera, almost brand new, is about to be sent off for repairs

apparently not able to withstand Monty bonking his head on it

And I'm not sure I could shoot in the dark anyways

but, in any case

taking Monty out before bedtime tonight

all is silent, all is bright

standing in the middle of a highway, albeit a small two-laner

not hearing a sound

i mean, utter silence

 no cars, no dogs barking, none of the summer night sounds of crickets or frogs

the only sound, if I listen real close, is the drum-like beat of my blood pulsing

through my temple

a car draws near on this silent sunday night

its sound muffled by the snow

by the time I hear it, whoosh, it's gone into the silence

and i hear nothing again

the sky above is starless and cloudy

yet enough light reflects from the clouds to the snow and back again

so that I do not need my flashlight

I am blessed indeed to live where i do

to be able to hear the silence

and appreciate its song